God. You know what's embarrassing? When you're Britain's most expensive footballer and you get pulled over by cops because you don't have a valid driving license. That's exactly what happened to poor Moises Caicedo last Friday.
The Chelsea midfielder - who cost the Blues an eye-watering £115 million (still can't believe that price tag) - was cruising near the training ground in his flashy Audi RSQ8 when Surrey police stopped him. Awkward.
Audio Summary of the Article
When £115 Million Doesn't Buy Common Sense
I was chatting with my mate who works security near Cobham last week, and he mentioned seeing players zooming past in their luxury cars daily. "These guys earn more in a week than I do in 3 years, but some can't be bothered to sort out proper paperwork," he texted me. His response when I told him about Caicedo: 'already updating my resume to be a footballer's personal assistant.'
The 23-year-old Ecuadorian has been regularly spotted behind teh wheel since joining Brighton back in 2021 (for a comparatively bargain £4.5m). Then Chelsea splashed out that record-breaking fee to bring him to West London in 2023.
Here's the thing - international drivers can use their foreign licenses in the UK for 12 months. After that? You need to get your British provisional license and pass the driving test like the rest of us mortals.
That Audi tho...
Let's take a moment to appreciate what was seized. The Audi RSQ8 is a beast that hits 155mph and reaches 60mph in just 3.8 seconds. Price tag? Around £160,000. That's more than my entire apartment.
I saw one of these parked outside Harrods back in 2022 and nearly walked into a lamppost gawking at it.
Cops pulled Caicedo over as he headed home to the place he shares with partner Paola Salazar. I feel stupid now for thinking professional athletes would have people managing these basic legal requirements for them.
Wait... are ALL the foreign players doing this?
This incident actually raises a pretty interesting question - how many other foreign footballers are cruising around without proper documentation? I'd bet $50 that Caicedo isn't the only one.
According to JMW (a law firm that probably didn't expect to be commenting on Premier League driving habits), "If you have been charged with driving without a licence, you could face serious punishment. Potential penalties for this type of offence include a fine, penalty points and a driving ban."
Driving ban. Imagine being a multimillionaire footballer having to Uber to training because you couldn't be bothered to take a driving test.
From poverty to problematic paperwork
The whole situation feels extra strange considering Caicedo's background. He's the youngest of ten siblings from Santo Domingo, Ecuador, coming from modest beginnings before making it big.
He's actually known for funding new football facilities in his hometown and playing casual matches with locals when he visits. From rags to riches... to having your supercar confiscated by Surrey Police. Life comes at you fast.
Surrey Police confirmed to the press: "A man in his 20s from Cobham was stopped by officers on Fairmile Lane in Cobham on Friday 4 April and found to be driving without a licence. The vehicle was seized, and our enquiries are ongoing."
Chelsea FC, meanwhile, is calling it a "personal matter." Translation: please stop asking us about our £115m midfielder's driving habits.
When contacted, Caicedo's agent Manuel Sierra Camacho was about as helpful as a chocolate teapot: "There is no comment from us about this matter. I'm sorry."
The midfielder flew to Poland yesterday with his teammates for today's Conference League match against Legia Warsaw. I'm guessing he wasn't behind the wheel of the team bus.
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External Links
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